Now that I’ve grabbed you with that stunning title, I must confess that none of what you will read here is either amazing or hard to believe, that is, unless you really haven’t done or seen much in your life.  Maybe you’re 2 years old.  If so, the fact that you can read is amazing and hard to believe in itself.

Regardless, this is trivia, which is defined as “matters or things that are very unimportant, inconsequential, or nonessential.”  What is this trivia about?  Me, of course.  It’s Me Trivia.  Perhaps you have certain trivia about yourself which you find interesting.  That is what we call You Trivia, and you won’t find any of that here unless, by sheer coincidence, we share certain common trivialities.

Here we go:

1. I’m afraid of heights, terrified in fact.  Enclosed places don’t bother me.  For example, flying is no big deal.  However, standing on a balcony three stories up or climbing a ladder are problematic.
2. I’m 5 feet, 8 inches tall.  I could swear I was 5′ 9″ at one time.
3. I have tiny feet.  Size 8–like matchboxes.  I’m surprised that I can even keep my balance.
4. I have a terrible jump shot.  It’s a flat, no spin heave.
5. I have difficulty telling left from right.
6. I haven’t driven a stick shift in 30+ years, and I don’t expect to ever drive one again.
7. I have vomited in public–more than once.
8. I have a massive baseball card collection.
9. I’m a tad claustrophobic
10. I met Chuck Norris.
11. I also met Captain Kangaroo.
12. For some reason, I tried to learn how to juggle–and failed.
13. I can’t go to my left, assuming I know which direction that is.
14. I quit playing golf after I beat a pitching wedge against a tree.
15. I have had drinks thrown on me–several times.
16. For reasons that baffle me, I really like Gordon Lightfoot’s The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald.
17. I have never felt like dancing.  Not even one time.
18. I haven’t been in many fights, but I always fight dirty.
19. Apocalypse Now is my favorite film.
20. Slaughterhouse Five is my favorite book.  Or maybe it’s East of Eden.
21. Crickets are the most terrifying of God’s creatures.
22. It is well-known in some circles that I was runner-up in the Loyall Spelling Bee.
23. I’ve never heard a Jim Croce song that I didn’t like.
24. I find Tina Fey attractive.
25. I always think foreign people will understand me if I yell at them.

So, there they are:  25 facts about me.  Now you know me better, and isn’t that what we all want?  Of course, I know you no better than I ever did, which suits me just fine.  That’s not to say that you aren’t fascinating in your own right.  It’s just that I remain more interested in me.  One final piece of trivia:  I was once evaluated as borderline narcissistic.  I didn’t include that, because it was obviously done by a quack.

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